Sunday, August 28, 2005

Of anger and me

Hmm, on the repeated asking of why I dont get angry, how do I manage it, which was asked by my sophomore class, both sections, I thought I'd post an entry on my blog.
Some people are clam by nature, some are not. I guess I'm more in the former than in the latter. I do get angry at times, which I'll explain later. But the students have said on their blogs, and in the questions they asked me in class that I dont get angry at them when they do stuff that other teachers get infuriated at, one of them even said, I'd just smile at them in return. As far as these sophomore kids are concerned, they mean something else to me, so except for, I think one time when I sent three or four of them to see their class advisor from the class, and even that, very calmly and then one asked them to be quiet and stuff, I havent really shown any anger towards them. I guess it's because I love them all so much for some reason. Even the so called back benchers. The first batch I've taught for two years straight. Maybe that has something to do with it. Even if I only did labs with them in first year. But you get angry at someone you care about, you dont get angry at someone you dont know, and I just love these kids, so at times I did get angry at them, but the reason was that I wanted the best for them.
Other than that, I think you get angry when you think you're something, and I dont. I'm just an ordinary guy. No matter how good you are, there's always someone better, so dont be proud of yourself. At the same time, look below you. There are so many less privileged than you and you did nothing to deserve to be more privileged than them. It's just Allah's scheme of things that we are who we are. One day, driving back from University on a Friday afternoon, I saw a man, with his wife and three small school kids walking along the road, apparently taking his kids back home from school. He had some fault with his leg and he was limping. His motor bike also appeared to have broken down and he was dragging it along, too. That scene is still in front of my eyes and I can see him vividly limping along right now, as I saw him that day, and the tears come to my eyes just as much as the tears had dropped on that day. Think about it. A father who loves his children so much, wants to comfort them, with a ride on the motor bike back from school at least. Imagine his agony to know that his little boys and girls are walking the dirt track with their little legs and backs tiring from the heft weights of their school bags and there's nothing he can do about it. I felt so strongly for him and I feel so strongly for him today. I thanked Allah then and I thank him every second that I dont limp, I have a car bigger than I need, I have a house bigger than I need, I have every luxury that I could imagine, and do I have anything to do with all that? No, it's all blessings. I could've been born in his place and he could've been born in mine. We cant change that, but at least we can thank Allah for that.
As insignificant as we are, we can not change who we are, we can not dictate what or who we are, then do we have a right to be angry? I dont think so. Well, sometimes you get angry, everyone does, but beyond that, having the anger on your nose, so to speak, I dont agree with that.
I guess that's how I would answer that question.

4 comments:

Razz said...

Agree with you, down to the last word! ... You're a great writer!

M Shoaib Sheikh said...

Read meticoulously and Agreeed....

Faisal Nasim said...

Silence is always not the best teacher but I do like your style! I have a few experiences of 'silent talking' with you! Like that day we had the IEEE meeting at 10.00a and nobody showed up. I said I'd be on one of the computers. When nobody showed up, you came and sat down on the chair in the other row and you sent a 'silent' ping at me through sight, I'm not good at sign/sight language but I was able to respond to it and I still remember the way you said 'LETS START...' without words. It was highly impressive!

As for the blog, for the first half, I'd say... nice, old man! For the second half, I'm glad you're sharing things which would affect others. I'll be giving you something. Do watch it (might sound boring at first)...

Muhammad Saqib Ilyas said...

Thanks. Silent Talking! I didnt know I did that. I've read the Paulo book end to end. Will read it again and probably mark it. Marvelous! I havent watched the videos yet. Just taking care of stuff still.